dear you,
let’s see what i have to say to you. about you. about how i feel for you. you’re technically not my teacher, and you’re five years older than me. or is it six? you talk to me all the time, and i see the way you look at me. i can see from the texts we send, that there’s something there. i just know it. make a move. do something. i think i feel the same way. i dunno what i feel. it’s not right. but just, try me.
-M
dear you,
yes you, i figure it’s about time i write about you. here, i’ll even say your name - flynn. i met you my first day of school, my first day of high school. which was about four days after my break up with my first love. i saw you sitting in the first side row of russian class, laid back talking to the people i had no idea would be my best mates in about a month. i sat close to you. not close enough to make it seem like i fancied you because you were extremely attractive, but not far enough to be giving you a cold shoulder. you asked what my name was, but you disregarded that it was michaela, and decided you were going to call me mickey. micks would later on be what you and only you called me. later on, far too long down the road did i learn that you were looking at me, too. we eventually started talking, all the time. i didn’t know if you had a girlfriend or not but boy did i fancy you! but seeing to how i fail at showing emotions, you thought i didn’t fancy you so you moved on and got yourself one. this killed me. but i kept on keeping on. i carried on talking to you, only to fall deeper and deeper into fancying you. when i found out i was moving, i pictured telling you i’d loved you from the very first day, and that we’d date, fall in love, and have beautiful children. yes, it sounds silly, but i dreamed of that. well that’s not how it went. it went more like, me crying on your shoulder and giving you a hug in front of your girlfriend. then i told you that night. about the four months of fancying you. and you admitted to fancying me! but make that fancy past tense. it didn’t go as planned and i was heart broken. so of course i drunkenly texted you! new years eve! we haven’t really talked much since i say the stupidest things. but today when i saw you, i felt a spark. a spark in my heart. that you didn’t get. i’m sorry. i’ll wait forever, cause i’ve loved you from the very first day.
love,
-micks
dear you,
you have made my life a living hell. i despise you. you like to start things? say i’m the center of every problem you’ve got? really now. sorry i took matthew away from you? but you’re a spineless, low life, cunt. and everybody can see straight through you. the only reason you told lee i was having sex with him, is because you’re jealous. jesus christ. get over yourself. get over matthew first though. because he will really never love you. especially since you’ve hurt me so bad. you stupid fucking piece of shit. do you want to get matthew and i in trouble? you say you’re his friend, but then you turn around and snitch on him for something you don’t even know is true? are you stupid? do you have some type of mental decapacity that prevents you from seeing you weren’t only snitching on me, you were snitching on US? in all seriousness you’re just a bitch. your life was previously hell before i came along so you can’t even say that i am the problem. you’re the problem. i’ve got bigger shit to deal with than you, and i don’t go around ruining people’s lives. you’re lucky matthew and i are such good liars or else we would have killed you on the spot. thanks a lot, cunt. i’ll see you in hell xxxx
-m
dear you,
for the past few days you’ve been saying you loved me before you left. really? you love me? then why do you have a girlfriend? that doesn’t make sense? you need to love me, or her. there’s no, “i love both of you, and i want to snog both of you”. i know i have no right to say this, look at my track record on relationships, i’ve been a bitch. but it still isn’t right of you. please just break up with her, i don’t want us to end…
-m
dear you,
you hug me, kiss me, make me feel welcome, wanted. i like you. i like you a lot. you like me in my pajamas, and in my best dress. who cares that you’re three years older than me? we might as well be the same age, we’re not on different levels or anything. you like me, i like you. but you have a girlfriend. as soon as i walk into your classroom you hop off of her because i know you like me. i really do. you have to. you respect me. “we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” you’re a music freak. you like music. it matters to you. you’re one of the only ones that gets that about me. you don’t understand me like he did, no way. but i don’t think anyone will. you still like me. i wish you’d break up with your girlfriend. you’re so sweet, you want to take me out to lunch. you don’t care about sex as much as you care about my well being. when i say i’m in hell, and i rant and rant and rant about this fuck hole of a town we live in, you listen. thank you.
i want to love you.
love,
-m
dear class of 2011,
as if i don’t have enough on my cluttered, depressive, angsty, angry mind, you all ar graduating. you are all three years older than me. you like me, and accept me for who i am. you aren’t my annoying freshman class, immature, bastardly cowards that have to say things to me over facebook or behind my back. you like me. please don’t graduate. please take me away from this town that is so mean to me. get me out of this cavern or i’ll cave in.
- z
Dear you,
In that lovely cigar humidifier I have from my dearest edd, is a letter, beneath my bed, that you’ll never see. You know you could slit my throat and with my last gasping breath I’d apologize for bleeding on your shirt. I’m sorry for crying on your shirt.
I love you,
-z
dear you,
i miss you. if you can miss someone you never really had, i surely do. you let other people raise me. you’ve always been more of a friend than a father. you’ve messed up. when laura left, and you blamed it on me, i was an angry, and confused 12 year old kid. i started smoking, failing classes, just to try and get your attention. you ignored me. i’ve been struggling at the surface trying to make it back up. you now know that i smoke, the first thing i did to try and get you to care. you didn’t care. you never care. i want to love you. i really do. but you’re never there. you’ve never been there longer than five seconds. you gave up on me. called me stupid when i dropped my grades. you weren’t worried and disappointed, you were mad. now you’re struggling for the upper hand, on a kid that’s had to grow up way too fast. i’m not even fifteen, and nobody believes it, because i act like i’m going on eighteen. you fucked me up. you fucked me up over, and over, and over again. you hit me. you’re ‘trying’. i don’t see it. i hardly see you. i can see that you can hardly look at me without sadness in those cold brown eyes. you have never ever tried to be there for me. never. i needed you, and you let me down. you let me fall, flat onto my face, to stand up, and look at the rest of the world. i was terrified, disgusted, and i was so lonely. you didn’t even notice.
your daughter,
-z
dear you,
i am so sorry. she’s better for you. what can i do? there’s nothing i can do. she is your age, she’s getting you to do better things, she’s better for you than i ever was. i am no competition to her. i’m glad you’re happy. and safe. you’re safe with her. and as much as i want you to be mine again, she will be better than i could ever be. memories seem to fade, on and on it goes, wash my view away. eventually i will forget. forget that feeling of complete safety, and comfort i had in your arms. then i will forget everything, as will you. we’ll fade away separately, but you’ll always be in my life. this is my selfless act, knowing you will be better off without me constantly there, needing you back. i don’t care what the future holds for me, i know that without me, your future is much brighter.
i am yours most sincerely,
-z
dear you,
you have no idea how much you mean to me. n o i d e a. i can call you whenever, whether i’m having problems with tomato, or molly, you’re there. always. you laugh with me, cry with me, love me. you’re the best. you’ve sat on the phone with me and calmed me down so many times, and it means so much. i hate lying to you. i slept with your son. i’m so sorry. i was in love with hiim. i’m sorry for what my friend has done to him, and your family, i’m sorry that you’ll never have your sister back. i am so sorry for everything. i never want you to feel any pain. i want you to be forever happy. you’re just, you. i love you. for you. you are my role model. you mean everything to me. i’m gonna say it a thousand time, you’re unreally fantastic. you understand my sense of humor, my problems, you understand me. you, and your son, are the only ones. you’re so fucking unbelievably, fantastically, beautifully, amazingly, you. i love you.
i am yours most sincerely,
-z
